Article: The Art of Saying No — Protecting Your Energy as a Mum

The Art of Saying No — Protecting Your Energy as a Mum
Remember when saying no was easy? Like when your friend asked if you wanted to go for a 5am run, and you laughed so hard you nearly spilled your wine?
Yeah… motherhood changed that.
Now it feels like we’re wired to say yes to everything — playdates, favours, extra work, that PTA bake sale where you somehow agreed to make 60 cupcakes with a toddler on your hip. But here’s the truth, mama: every “yes” costs you something. And sometimes, that something is your sanity.
💆♀️ Why Mums Struggle to Say No
Because we care.
Because we want to help.
Because saying no can feel like letting someone down — whether it’s your mother-in-law, your boss, or that little voice inside that whispers, “good mums do it all.”
But doing it all comes at a price. You end up stretched thinner than a cheap nappy, running on caffeine and crumbs, wondering why you feel exhausted all the time. Spoiler: it’s because you keep giving energy you don’t have to spare.
⚡ The Power of Protecting Your Energy
Your energy is like your phone battery — it only lasts so long before you hit low-power mode. You wouldn’t let your phone die before the school pickup, so why let yourself?
Saying no isn’t selfish. It’s a form of self-respect. When you protect your time and energy, you’re saying,
“I value myself just as much as everyone else.”
And here’s the magic bit — when you’re not running on empty, you’re actually a better mum, partner, and friend. Because you’re not resentful, exhausted, or snapping at anyone who breathes too loudly near you.
🛑 How to Say No Without Feeling Guilty
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Start small.
You don’t have to cancel Christmas. Begin with little things, like skipping a playdate when you just need a quiet morning at home.
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Blame the baby (or the toddler, or the dog).
Classic move. “Sorry, nap time’s all over the place today!” No one argues with nap time. Ever.
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Replace “I can’t” with “I’m not able to right now.”
It sounds softer, but it still means no. Because “maybe later” is mum code for “absolutely not.”
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Pause before you say yes.
You don’t have to answer immediately. Take a breath. Ask yourself: Will this drain me or fill me up? If it’s the first one — hard pass.
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Remember: no explanation required.
“No” is a complete sentence. You don’t owe anyone a detailed breakdown of your mental load, your baby’s sleep regression, or your laundry mountain.
🌿 Reclaiming Your “No” Power
Saying no isn’t about being difficult — it’s about being deliberate. It’s how you make space for what actually matters: your family, your peace, your mental health… and maybe even a hot cup of coffee (a girl can dream).
So next time you feel pressured to do something that doesn’t sit right, channel your inner Beyoncé and say:
“No, thanks. I’m prioritising my energy.”
Because your time is precious, your energy is sacred, and no one — not even that well-meaning mum from playgroup — deserves to drain it.
💛 Final Thought
Motherhood is full of “yes” moments — yes to cuddles, yes to memories, yes to messy love. But sometimes, the most powerful thing you can say is no.
Because protecting your energy isn’t selfish.
It’s survival.